Your silence is the most perfect expression of scorn...That's why I am leaving...
I just do bullshit in your presence...
When I should speak I get silent, I say nonsense after another when best should be silent...
I make bad jokes, look like crazy and suffer before, during and after seeing you...
I will not be here anymore because there is no future and this is not the most difficult to deal, worse is that there is no present and the past is more fluid than air...
I will not be here anymore because there is nothing I can redeem...
My absence is coward but watchful, a bit bogus a bit authentic, because leaving is a game of patience for me. Vanishing is a risk but also wisdom...
I look disinterested, but I am not, I am leaving because this is the only way for you to always be by my side, even if only in my imagination...
Longing (Saudade) will do more for me than the love I feel for you and for my clumsy and thoughtless stay.
Be happy.
